Help Me Never Work Again


This site is my attempt to raise money so I can live the life I have always dreamed of instead of the life that we are all forced to deal with. YOU can help one lovable slacker (me) never work again. We've all wanted to tell our boss off at one point or another, and now you can be directly responsible for somebody doing just that. For every dollar I receive, I will spend 5 minutes sending positive thoughts and energy to the contributor. Remember, the next best thing to doing nothing is paying someone else to do it for you.

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These pledge levels are by no means a minimum or a maximum. Please feel free to make as small or as large of a contribution as you are comfortable with.

Pledge $40

For a pledge of only $40 or more, you will receive a special gift! In addition to over three hours of positive energy headed your way, I'll be sending you an autographed color photo of me hard at not work! See the fruits of your labor in a portrait of one lovable slacker (me) passed out on the couch after watching TV. It's the perfect addition to your desk at the office for those days when you feel you've just had enough. A glance at this great gift will give you the peace of mind that at least one stinkin' person on this Earth is doing what they like to do, and you played a major role in that.

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Pledge $120

When you kick $120 my way, I've got another gift for you. You'll get ten hours of positive thoughts and energy sent your way, the photo gift from the $40 pledge, plus you'll also receive a small, personally-made origami model! Granted, you might have to do the final bits of unfolding since it'll come in a regular envelope, but really the whole point is for me to do no work at all. Paper airplanes count, by the way.

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Pledge $200

For a generous $200 or more pledge, I've got an extra special treat. This pledge level still guarantees you over sixteen hours of positive thoughts and energy, as well as the gifts from the $40 -and- $120 levels, but it also includes a fully personalized bit of official Slackin.org Cheeto-hand artwork that is sure to bring you year round warm & fuzzies should you actually decide to frame it and hang it somewhere visible. In a true demonstration of the possibilities in never working again, I will sit around eating a bag of Cheetos and create a wonderfully fused masterpiece of napkin and orange cheese dust specifically for you.

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